Creativity wants to be birthed from me
All my day-dreams want to escape their solitude
I want it too, but I keep doubt holding me down
While the congress in my mind continually argues excuse
Maybe I'm not cursed, maybe I'm just clearly a fool
To hold talents and vision to lapse in synapse
My collective works of art all fragments of thought
Will I release them one day or just choose to relapse
While dreams fan the embers trying to ignite this flame
While I'm holding my breath just hoping for change
It's a shame because my vision maintains to be blurry
And I won't hurry out to greet what I feel is estranged
For I like my comforts and all that's familiar
But don't think that I'm lazy in this imagination
I've lived more lives then I'm willing to confess
And that might be enough, as I figure, in relation
Yet some like a more institutionalized way
Where the weight of success is a constant demand
Start a rat race for a title to claim
To the applause of a corporate command
But sometimes the gutter holds treasures and shade
And I'm more apt to just stoop to that level
For I'd rather have nothing then the pride of a slave
Enchanted, advocating the devil
Relax, it's a fact, the idols of religion
Are a manifest destiny in all of our trades
Trained like an animal, shaped in behavior
To the display of identity through these parades
But I'm tired of marching to tunes undistinguished
From every other cult that sings their own praise
So until my dreams are clear, I'll just stay in this place
And try not to feel burdened by the means of delay
Life might be short but why rush to mistake
To forsake who you are in exchange of promotion
When you could hone your own skill, though it may not be staged
Is it still not a worthy devotion
I think it might be, so I'll continue to dream
And if some fade away, well it is what it is
After all, what nightmare would come to arise
If I was granted every one of my wishes
So I'll wrestle with patience, impatient, impatience
Dancing twelve rounds with doubt and assurance
I'll take my own beating and rise, and repeating
In the hopes I'll still find my endurance
Don't need approval, don't need the applause
Yet sometimes I still crave it in panic
Trauma as it surfaced, to heal to a purpose
In the hopes I'll finally break the habit